We took Carter on his first big trip over the Christmas holiday, we flew out to California to visit family, the angel slept all the way there on the plane…passed out cold. What a doll. We schleped him to the LA Zoo, Huntington Beach and more. We even dipped his feet in the sand and surf. I think he may surf before he crawls. The trip was nice for the most part, I felt like we really bonded as a family. Staci and I shared the waking up duties, etc. And Carter helped us out by starting to sleep from Midnight all the way through to about 6-7 am. Thank you baby!
So, Carter it is… December 17, 2007
We tossed out names, Atticus, Getty, we were pretty sold on one of those two, and then he was coming…what should we name him…out came the baby name book and the absurd ideas for names…”seriously? seriously you want to name him what?” and then, I awoke the morning he was to arrive, “What do you think about Carter?” “I like Carter she said, and that is weird because when I called my folks to tell them the news they were in the Jimmy Carter library and joked we should name him that…” “Well, then it’s a sign…Carter it is, Carter Kennedy” With a name like that, how can you go wrong? Speaking of names, we have the Mommy, momma debate going on…with two mommies what do you do? I had the funniest idea…I will be mommy and she will be Edamame? I like it, it might stick.Loving baby life…A
HE’S Here! He’s Here! December 15, 2007
Well, not long after my last post, Oct. 22 to be exact, we got a call about a healthy baby boy ready to leave the hospital the next day would we like him. My partner called and I was at the Genius Bar at Apple with my Mac, phone wasn’t on…I finally get her call as I am driving, she is frantic….”WHY AREN’T YOU CALLING ME BACK?” She goes on to start explaining, so and so called from the bureau, he’s 2 days old, healthy, negative drug screen….blah blah blah, her voice becomes a Peanuts teacher voice…I YELL, SHUT UP! STOP TALKING, CALL THEM BACK AND SAY YES BEFORE THEY GIVE HIM TO SOMEONE ELSE! I mean, really, what is there to think about? We hang up, she calls me back…ok, they will call us tomorrow about what time we can go get him at the hospital. HOLY SHIT! We never thought we would get a baby, let a lone a 3 day old!Quick run to Target for all the last minute things we didn’t have yet because we had no idea if we were getting a 3 day old or a 3 year old…Onesies, Bottles, Sleepers, Pacifiers, Blankies, Rattles, Pack n play for downstairs… you name it we bought it. They showed up on the 23rd, car pulled up, my Partner went to the car as I took photos of the arrival. In came the tiniest baby in a carseat…she took him out, we signed papers, we were briefed (and I mean brief!) on his circumcision and umbilical cord, signed more papers and the worker was gone…10 minutes over, done…here we were with a 3 day old baby…scared…excited…S said, “Wanna hold him?” as she stood with a deer in the headlights look over her face…”Not yet, I need a minute.” I replied…it took a good day for the fear to wash over us. Fast forward to 2 months later, fear is mostly gone, we love this kid so much and are already moving forward with the long, long battle of legal work to make him ours. He coos, smiles, giggles, kicks, swats at dangling toys and has graduated from Newborn diapers to level 2. He has doubled in weight since our first day with him. He is healthy and thriving and we are so thrilled. So, life is different, in a good way. No more weekly AHL Hockey games, I work from home more, I schlep a very heavy infant carseat carrier around to fro stores as I shop…oh and I am in Target or Babies R Us at least, LEAST once a week. I have learned so much in the short two months…from bad plastic baby bottles (we have switched to Born Free, highly recommend it, we have some glass bottles from them and some plastic from them for traveling), to how to tuck a baby boy penis in the diaper the right way to prevent them from shooting urine out their diaper. TRUST me, you will not find that tip in ANY baby how to book. And we also realized that the book, “What to expect the first year” is all crap, CRAP I tell you…if you want a GOOD baby book get DR. Sears baby book, he is good. We also got his book on Attachment Parenting, which is good for anyone but especially for those adopting. Trust me, so far attachment has not been a problem, he is very cuddly.I hope to be here more often, as I have so much catching up to do.Thank you all for being patient!A
UPDATE October 16, 2007
Well, so much has happened to bring us to this stage but it is a stage we have always considered. We are now licensed with the State of Wisconsin as Foster Parents. We are fostering to adopt. We have been licensed for a few weeks now and are anxiously awaiting a placement, one that will hopefully last a lifetime. In the mean time, we tidy up the childrens rooms, organize, add songs to the kids ipod, buy books, toys and the like…all in much anticipation for a match.
Long hard road July 17, 2007
After going through the hoops for a private homestudy we realized it is very difficult to be your own agent. Meaning, searching without an agency for a child available for adoption on adoptuskids.org or the like. It is a full time job trying to fax homestudies to agencies, follow up, etc. The adoption process is very messed up, full of holes and errors and people working long, hard, over booked hours and yet, you cannot get through to anyone. I know it is not the case workers faults, its just a system that is overloaded and full of red tape and errors. And the children wait…as do we. We wait for them, they wait for us. Neither of us knowing who the other is yet. Now we have decided to go with our state agency. Initially we were told our private (and expensive) home study would be reused with the state, but it is not so. We are now going through the state process, more paperwork, more interviews, and now in the final stretch we find that before we can have a child placed with us we have to complete 12 – 3 hour courses. So now we are craming in 4 classes a week for the next 3 weeks, hoping to be done by the second week in August.The bedrooms are set and decorated. In our home lie toys, beds, cribs and car seats all awaiting a child or children. Since the age range we are open to is from infant to 7 years old we were required to purchase car seats and a crib just incase. It’s all part of the licensing for foster to adopt care. It’s sad to walk past empty rooms and see the crib and toddler beds each day…but exciting at the same time. Hopefully soon we will know more.
New Plan… January 15, 2007
So, as I mentioned in earlier posts, attempt #3 was an early miscarriage, which put us on a holding pattern. Then, we were ready to try back up in January 2007, when I was told my titer for measles came back too low. Meaning, if I were to get pregnant and came into contact with someone with measles in the 3rd trimester, I could have a child with birth defects. Then I had an accident and tore my ACL. So putting extra weight via pregnancy is not a good idea.So we are starting the paperwork for foster/adoption. We are so excited at the idea of having children I cannot stand it! Tonight we have meeting #1 of 2 in our homestudy!
I know, it’s been awhile… October 20, 2006
a long while. It has been hard to write when there is not much to write about. Since the miscarriage we decided to take the summer off of baby making. My schedule is crazy in the summer with travel for work and it is hard to schedule life around where you need to be when you are ovulating. Since then there have also been some things in my health that we have discovered. I have always known about my hypothyroid condition but now my cholesterol is very high. My doctor did not want to put me on cholesterol meds because I am trying to conceive but I weighed the facts and would rather get myself healthy than not take the meds. We figure I am no good to my partner or a child if I cannot live a healthy life, or live at all for that matter. Also, my doctor said I have Metabolic Syndrome, basically my genetics are so (thanks mom and dad) that I have naturally high cholesterol and risk becoming diabetic, as well as having a risk for developing Polycystic ovarian, something or other…ie, makes baby making more difficult. This summer we have been looking into foster care and or adoption. We debate out of the country, vs within the USA. There are so many factors at play here and we are just sort of clueless of what to do, where to start, what our options are financially as well as things that may limit us do to our sexual orientation. It’s all so frustrating considering that we have so much love, life and laughter to share…all things we know would be so much more meaningful and fun if we shared it with a child or children. So, updating is hard to do when you are discouraged and feel like there is no good news to report.God, I hope Novembers election goes our way…vote NO Wisconsin.